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Reader Note: This article is Part 2 of a 3-part series on Listening Levels, a framework for Chiefs of Staff to lead more effectively by listening deeply, adapted from Oscar Trimboli’s work.
In Part 1: Inward, we focused on quieting your internal noise. In this article we turn outward to what’s said, how it’s said and the context that gives it meaning.
The Tell
People know when you’re not listening.
Just like you know when someone’s not listening to you.
It’s instant. Their eyes drift. They stop nodding in rhythm with your words. Worse their Apple Watch buzzes and they glance down mid-sentence. (Honestly, that’s one reason I stopped wearing mine.)
Even on the phone, you can feel it. The cadence flattens. The rhythm slips. The pause after your sentence lingers a little too long.
We’ve all been there. Deep listening isn’t just hearing. It’s seeing, sensing and being fully present.
Outward listening, the second level in the Listening Levels Framework (read part 1 here), is about tuning into what’s beneath and around the words: the delivery, the cues the context.
Interestingly, almost no one has had formal listening training and yet we all instantly know when we’re not being heard.
The Two Dimensions of Outward Listening
In every important conversation comprehension runs on two tracks:
Content – How something is said: tone, pace, emphasis, body language, what’s rushed, what’s loud or quiet and what’s skipped altogether
Context – Why it’s being said that way: the emotion, the timing, the backstory, the assumptions underneath the message
Together, they tell the real story. They deepen understanding and build connection.
Level 2 listening asks you to step outside yourself. To slow the pace, embrace silence (even 5 seconds of it) and drop “I” from your responses. It’s about staying with what’s unfolding without jumping in to solve or steer.
Listening to the Content
Focus on how things are said.
When you only hear the words, you miss what’s actually being communicated.
This is where friction first shows up. It’s a mismatch between message and tone or delivery and emotion. Catching that early lets you redirect confusion, clear up misalignment and help the speaker find better language.